Stuart might be being honest here… my paternal grandparents made it a point not to praise my father or his siblings to their face in fear of it giving them an ego problem, which had the effect of each of them thinking they were the “un-favorite” child until they caught onto it years afterwards. And while I’m not saying this is the reason my dad was an absentee provider father-type, my aunt hates having her photograph taken, and my uncle has manic-depressive tendencies, I doubt it helped matters.
I think the takeaway is to not lean into either extreme. Don’t don’t praise your children at all to the point they think they’re worthless, but also don’t praise them so much that they think they’re the center of the universe.
If they do something good or amazing, then let them know that. Of course you have to make sure that if they do something bad or horrible, be sure to let them know that it’s wrong and it should never be repeated.
Nothing good comes out of overly praising or overly putting down your child.
Stuart might be being honest here… my paternal grandparents made it a point not to praise my father or his siblings to their face in fear of it giving them an ego problem, which had the effect of each of them thinking they were the “un-favorite” child until they caught onto it years afterwards. And while I’m not saying this is the reason my dad was an absentee provider father-type, my aunt hates having her photograph taken, and my uncle has manic-depressive tendencies, I doubt it helped matters.
I think the takeaway is to not lean into either extreme. Don’t don’t praise your children at all to the point they think they’re worthless, but also don’t praise them so much that they think they’re the center of the universe.
If they do something good or amazing, then let them know that. Of course you have to make sure that if they do something bad or horrible, be sure to let them know that it’s wrong and it should never be repeated.
Nothing good comes out of overly praising or overly putting down your child.